Saturday, July 29, 2006

Rae's been busy

Ya - she's nesting. She's got boxes of stuff ready for a garage sale. The guest room is pretty much cleaned out and ready for Babies R Us to move in. The whole house is getting reorganized. She is even going through her shoes and putting some into the "for sale" boxes.

If you know Rae, you know how big of a deal this is. Rae hoardes shoes like I hoard ... well, everything else.

We're also planning a trip to the fabric store to pick up some material to make pillows. Lots of cleaning going on. I wouldn't be surprised if we order a baby bedroom set while we are out and about today.

Meanwhile, I'm sitting here in front of the computer waiting for lunch to get done.

Mmmmmmmm. Cheesy hot dogs.

Friday, July 28, 2006


The baby totally kicked me.


Thursday, July 27, 2006

Baby schwag

We've slowly but surely been gathering things for Kaylee's arrival.** Berda sent us a whole box full of clothes. Shirts. Pants. Onesies. And those headbands that little baby girls who have no hair wear so you can tell that they are girls.

I hope Kaylee has hair. I think those headbands look a bit odd. Maybe I'll just get her a shirt that says "I'm a girl, dammit!"

Other things we have picked up include:

Kaylee's (already favorite) Aunt Margaret sent this bear (it's not a bear - it's a marsupial!) with Kaylee's name and apparently her foot prints on the shirt. Still not sure how she pulled that off. Rae doesn't remember the baby being missing for any period of time. Oh, and the tag on her butt even says "Kaylee." How cool is that?

We found this onesie in San Diego and just couldn't pass it up. Rather, Rae just couldn't pass it up. We drove seven hours in the middle of the night to go to a comic book convention ... and buy baby clothes.

This is Moxy. We found her while we were on vacation in Charlotte last month. She is officially one of the ugliest stuffed animals I have ever seen. So we had to buy her.

And here's Rae meeting Moxy's older brother Ox in San Diego. We were going to bring him home too, but he wouldn't fit in the crib. Besides, I don't think he looks baby safe.

** If you sent us something and I didn't mention it, don't take it personally. We don't dislike what you sent us – I just couldn't think of anything witty to say about it.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

On the road again ...

Well, it's official. We've hit that stretch in the middle where's it's boring and nothing is happening.

It's like the road trips we used to take to Grandma's house. Right now we're stuck in the mind-numbingly boring southern end of Missouri. It takes so long to get through you actually pray for the Arkansas state line.

We've done all the fun stuff. We know she's a girl. And we know her name is Kaylee. Now we're just waiting to meet her. Don't get me wrong – there's still a lot to do and experience. It's just that the BIG stuff is out of the way already.

Rae did call me into the other room tonight (upsetting my game of Grand Theft Auto). Kaylee was kicking so hard her belly was moving. But she got real shy as soon as I showed up. One of these days I'll be able to sneak up on her. It shouldn't be THAT hard. I mean, even if her eyes were open she couldn't see me.

On an almost related note – Rae and I have decided to take a weekend trip. One last weekend away before Kaylee changes our social life forever. We're packing up the convertible and driving out to San Diego for an overnight trip. (Yeah, it's another dork trip.)

You like how I did that? Started with a road trip and ended with a road trip? You'd think I was a professional writer or something. Jack Bleedin' Kerouac or something.


Sunday, July 16, 2006

Baby Registry blues

OK - I apologize. The Babies R Us website stinks. If you click on the link and try to search for Racheal Rice or Michael Rice you'll be told that zero registries meet your search criteria.

BUT – if you search for Rice in AZ you'll find us.

Since emailing the site did no good, I called the customer service number. An overly-polite service representitive tells me that it will be fixed soon. I'm not holding my breath.

Side note: The phone number is 1-888-BABYRUS. I misdialed 1-800 ... and got a good laugh. Let's just say the phone number is more about making babies. ;-)

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Butt jokes*

As most of you know, my mom died of colon cancer a couple of years ago. And it's one of those things that just happens to run in the family. Which puts me at risk. Dad's been riding my ass (Ha!) for YEARS now to get checked out.

I've been thinking hard about this for a long time – and I finally got off my butt (Ha!) and scheduled my colonoscopy. It's not going to happen for a couple of months, apparently there are a lot of people in line to get a camera crammed up their bum. All of your nagging paid off. It's on the books and will happen.

Dad's been after me to do this. Rae's been after me to do this. My sister has been after me to do this. My entire family has been after me to do this. Really – it's one of the last things I want to do. I just don't want to know.

But I'm doing it for Kaylee.

Kid's not even here yet and she's already a pain in my ass.


* Butt jokes have been distinguished in the copy above with a (Ha!) just in case you don't have a sense of humor, or mine isn't as good as I think it is.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

More pictures

Basically Rae is expanding forward. If you compare these pictures to past ones it's like someone just pulled her chest and belly out and left everything else alone.

I'm pretty sure that in the second photo – she's trying to see her toes.

She's in mid-week 20 for those of you playing along at home.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Bah ... you guys are no fun

I was hoping to drag that on for at least a week. Now I actually have to think about what I'm going to post. :-P

So yes, the answer is Kaylee Marie Rice. That's her name and we're sticking to it. Unless she actually turns out to be a he - in which case I have no idea what we'll name him. Actually, we may keep Kaylee and just make him wear a dress. A big shiny pink dress.

So my friend Dave is the winner by default. He guessed Kaylee in the comments. His prize shall be great. (Though I don't know what it is - or when he will actually receive it.)

"Craig Thompson" put two and two together and came up with the whole name - but he wins nothing because I have no idea who he is. Unless he's the guy who created "Blankets" in which case he rocks.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Can I have an "I"?

Does that help? Feel free to guess another letter. One guess per day. I'll update the next day with more blanks filled in - or not. Guess by clicking the "Comment" link at the bottom of the post.

Shotgun update
No, I haven't bought one yet - but my friend Dave writes:

I suggest a Barretta gas powered 12 gauge. It hold 8 shells is semi automatic (meaning you can fire it as fast as you can pull the trigger) it doesn't kick much (for a shotgun) and it will blow a log in half with three shots. Yes, a whole log in half. Badass huh?

I'll have to look into that. And then I'll take my brother-in-law up on those lessons.

Baby registry

Rae and I had some problems with the online version of our list. I'm hoping they fix it in the next couple of days. Link is still to the right. ------>

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Name update and more

Here's the E's. Feel free to guess another letter. One guess per day. I'll update the next day with more blanks filled in - or not. Guess by clicking the "Comment" link at the bottom of the post.

At the baby store

So Rae and I spent 4 hours at Babies-R-Us yesterday. We combed through the entire store looking at all the things we need to buy. And even after you weed out all the crap that only ├╝ber-consumers would buy (like the wipes warmer) there's still a lot. So we did the next best thing - we registered for it all. That way you guys can buy it all for us.

Link is in the rail on the right (not that I'm hinting or anything.)

There won't be any baby shower - since we live here and all of you live everywhere but here. So I suggest you plan between yourselves to get together in small groups, have some cake, play some stupid games and tell us how much fun you had.

We made our first official purchase though. I own a stroller. Never really thought I'd be able to say that. But the good news is we managed to avoid the SUV strollers.

Which believe me, is very hard to do. I could ride in 99% of the strollers they sell today. And I really don't want to be that person whose stroller takes up the whole aisle at the mall.

I hate that person.

Oh - I did register for the baby wipes warmer. I'm not going to buy that crap - but I can make fun of one of you for buying it.

Saturday, July 08, 2006

We have a name

I know. Rae knows. Grandma knows.
And none of us are telling. Yet.

Friday, July 07, 2006

Into the pool

I'm at a total loss as to how to start this. The baby has been Himmer for so long I don't know if I can talk about her without slipping into gender neutral speak.


Her due date is 11/28/06. We've established that. And the ultrasound the other day gave the BDM no reason not to trust it.

But she doesn't know Rae and I very well.

In case you hadn't noticed, and I'd be very surprised, Rae and I are notoriously late. Not very late - but we're always running 20 minutes slow.

At least.

So I just wanted to make a prediction.

She will be born 11/30/06 at 3:24 a.m.

She will be screaming. Rae will be exhausted. I'll be the one with a camera.

In other news: Rae went back to the Baby Doctor today. No news is good news. Rae has officially gained back all the weight she lost so far. The only other thing I can think of to pass on to you is that the baby weighs about 1 pound now and is about the size of a banana.

Maybe I should be calling her Chiquita?

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

So you really want to know?

So, as you know, I accompanied Rae to the Baby Doctor again this morning. Well, it wasn't The Baby Doctor - rather one of her many minions. Our goal - show me the money. Boy or girl, I don't care, just give me two arms, two legs, ten fingers and toes.

So we're escorted into a dark room. Rae is instructed by the Baby Doctor Minion (hence-forth known as the BDM) to lie down on the table and whip out her belly. I am told to go sit in the corner where I can watch all the action on the television.

TV. I get to watch TV. What a perfect morning. I love TV.

So Rae pulls out the Buddha belly (which is looking quite round these days - hard to believe it will get bigger) and the BDM squeezes a bunch of jelly on to it and begins to move it around with this flashlight/mouse looking thing.

The rest of it is a blur. All of a sudden I'm looking at Himmer in real-time. For the first time. This is so cool. I get to see Himmer's brain and watch hisser heart beat (just like E.T.) and the BDM tells us that Himmer's bladder is currently full. To her that means the kidneys are working properly. It only reminds me that Himmer is swimming around in hisser own pee.

How's that for a first shot? Look on the right and you'll see Himmer's head. S/he's looking up into the camera/flashlight/mouse-looking thingie. You can see eyes, nose, mouth ... Basically Himmer's whole face. It's that skull-looking thing.

Now that's more like it. The typical ultrasound profile. Head on the right, then the body and that flappy thing on the left is Himmer's femur. S/he's all curled up in the fetal position. Go figure. And look at that nose - isn't it cute? Looks like Himmer got Rae's nose. Yay!

But is it a boy or a girl? That's all we want to know!

Yeah - well I had to wait until the end, so you do too.

So the BDM asks us if we want to know the sex of Himmer. And since we're both sick of Himmer, hisser and s/he we both say yes. So the BDM says she'll see if she can get Himmer to cooperate with us so we can find out. Yeah, we got cooperation. We got spread eagle.

Looks like we're going to have to work on teaching her how to sit like a lady.

That's my not so subtle way of telling you we're having a girl.

Rae's a little disappointed. Not because it's a girl - but because she was sure it is a boy. She just wanted to be right.

Me? I'm thrilled. I've got so many new things to experience now. I've never been a gun person - but I'm going out tomorrow to buy a real nice shotgun. I'll probably never fire it - just save it for when she gets to dating age. Then I'll bring it out to polish whenever her would-be boyfriends come by the house.

It's all a lot more real now. Himmer is a her. Now we can start working on names.

T-minus one hour ...

Headed to the Baby Doctor soon. Hunting for twigs and berries. Or the lack thereof. Updates as they happen.

UPDATE: I'm sure the anticipation is killing you. Photos and update coming as soon as I get off work. :)

Monday, July 03, 2006

Himmer's first dork experience ...

Himmer is a dork.

Rae and I travelled to a comic book convention over the weekend. Yes, a comic book convention. I will give you a minute to get over your snickering fit.

And no, we don't dress up in costumes, we don't play with Pokemon cards and we don't discuss the merits of Star Trek vs. Star Wars. (At least not at length.)

Better? Then we move on.

So I'm sure himmer could sense the anticipation. As soon as we got on the plane s/he started kicking the crap out of Rae. Not that fluttery "I've got gas" feeling but full-on "HEY, STICK YOUR HAND RIGHT HERE AND FEEL THIS" sensations.

Numerous times I had to remind Rae that we were in a public place and I wasn't going to stick my hand down the front of her shorts so I could attempt to feel the baby. (She was just excited - and no, I never felt the kick).

So all during the flight there, kicking. Waiting in line early Friday morning, kicking. During the con, kicking. After the con? Not so much, himmer seemed to settle down.

My explaination? Himmer is a capital D-O-R-K. S/he got all excited for the convention (probably anticipating hisser first Adam Hughes sketch - which will have to wait for next year), was thrilled to be there and was so tired out from the event that s/he could barely muster up the energy to kick Rae in protest of having to leave.

I'm sure that's what it was. I'll have to ask the baby doctor about it Wednesday. (REMINDER: We're going in for the big ultrasound then.) I can't wait. We're very excited. We'll finally be able to focus on just one list of names.

I wonder if you can put an AH! sketch on a baby shower gift registry?